Never ever in the history, my history, of Radio City have they ever cancelled shows. Until today. Two shows cancelled in the Snowpocalypse of Washington DC, three cancelled tomorrow. And by the way...as of right now...11:09pm....it's not snowing at all. Why do I feel guilty? I've been given one of the best gifts mother nature has up her sleeve around this time of year...a Snow Day! Zero responsibility outside of late brunches, snow angels, & hot cocoa. A lot of people on this crazy tour's spirits have been crying so loudly for a day off that Ms. Mother Nature herself answered their prayers.
“Nature has no mercy at all. Nature says, "I'm going to snow. If you have on a bikini and no snowshoes, that's tough. I am going to snow anyway."” - Maya Angelou
Instead of doing the last two shows of the day I got to catch up with my sister, have an incredibly fun dinner, & a giant mug of hot cocoa while watching Scrooged. (which is my favorite Christmas movie ever) There's just something so romantic in a Snow Day...it's an immeasurable force in the universe, Mother Nature, giving you permission to relinquish all responsibility for the day & feed your soul every comforting luxury it needs. Your boss, my boss, the corporate Radio City suits, can't argue with Mother Nature. What she says goes & apparently the people of DC have been working too hard, 'tis the season to drive yourself crazy.
It's time to crawl back into bed reach for a warm drink & your favorite Christmas movie. The weather outside is frightful. What I wouldn't give for a day off with my family, the fireplace & the frosty view of the river behind the house, hidden under sheets of grey blue ice & mounds of snow. Putting up a Christmas tree, with all of the ornaments my mother, the original crafty lady, & my Pop Pop, from whom she got the talent put hours & hours into crafting. It's been so long since I've seen any of them. I have my own box of ornaments at home, each one wrapped carefully with it's own memory in a sheet of old newspaper & tucked away in a box. Maybe it's in the attic, or the garage...waiting patiently for the day to come where I once again will have a tree to ever so painstakingly arrange them on for the holiday season. For now I will just have to settle with admiring the perfectly color coordinated, expertly designed trees in the lobbies of the hotels I seek refuge in night after night on this contract. Don't get me wrong, they're stunning, & I love them, but those ornaments don't contain the memories that mine do. My Christmas tree never looks so coordinated...it's more eclectic, more patchwork, more me.
Christmas is about family & memories & love & selflessness & hope. Things that easily fall through the cracks when I'm doing my best to get my laundry done, keep my suitcase organized, eat well, stay hydrated & somehow find time to Christmas shop, all while performing & traveling ever day...I'm spreading Christmas cheer to hundreds of thousands of families, in fact, becoming a very special part of their Christmas memories, but I've been unable to enjoy this Christmas season myself...instead I'm sitting on my bathroom floor with a white knuckle grip on my childhood Christmas memories & tears in my eyes, cursing the world for changing so much. Who wouldn't want to go back just once & be a kid on Christmas again? Dude if my six year old self caught me wasting the best time of the year the way I have been this season, she'd kick me in the shins so hard I'd have a bruise until next Christmas!! Those are my memories, & I keep them very near my heart, I can't ever have those days back....no amount of kleenex & Bruce Springsteen's "Santa Clause is Coming to Town" on repeat will take me back in time. Trust me, I asked....but then I realized I've been looking at this all wrong. So maybe my mom, dad & sister aren't all here with me...That doesn't mean I'm without family. My family here just happens to be comprised of Rockettes, singers, dancers, LPs, sound guys, riggers, bus drivers,
caterers, stage manages, company managers, wardrobe people, hair people, prop guys, & I'm sure I'm forgetting someone...It's unethical...but so am I. All things considered, I'm pretty lucky, I just needed a gentle reminder that although I may not be able to go back in time to Christmas' past, I can still approach the holiday season with just as much anticipation as I did when I was a kid, I get to spend it with a bunch of really amazing people! I'm going to try and be extra thankful for what I do have this holiday season, take a moment to admire all the holiday decorations & possibly throw a snowball or two on my snow day! Enjoy everyone!